SKYLER ELIZABETH

barebackcontessa:

Shit Houstonians Say (OMG I AM SORRY BUT THIS IS RELEVANT TO ME)

I have said all of these especially:

• Could the baristas at Brasil be any more disdainful (ugh those fucking hipsters)
• The farthest outside the loop I’ll go is the Galleria (ok I take offense because I live literally on the edge of the loop by the Galleria)
• If you take me to Whata I’ll totally buy you a honey butter chicken biscuit (I have gotten lots of men this way)
• That is like so 281 (713 rep it!)
• You could not pay me to live in the Woodlands (omg once I had to drive out there and I almost killed myself)
• I thought Rosenberg was by Fredericksburg (srsly what is Rosenberg?!)
• You couldn’t pay me to take the bus (hello I’m white)
• You’re from Dallas, sucks to suck (all Dallas people are the worst. see: The A-List: Dallas)